For Me, For You

                                             

Insults. Spittle. Mockery. Taunts. His dear face.

Whips. The lash. The tear. The pain. His strong back.

The crown of thorns. His crown. The blood. His loving head.

For you, for me.

Nakedness. The essence of His manhood

Bowing humble and limp

To the shame of the sun and earth

As he hung helpless on the tree.

The cross, the weight. The journey. His tired cries.

The struggle. His efforts. The slaps. His dear bleeding mouth.

For you, for me.

For all his doubling and troubling

You are a champion at killing with your mouth

I am an expert at raping with my eyes.

For all the tears and blood

You specialize in cheating without remorse

I control the region of the unbridled stupidity

Of envy and jealousy.

While He almost regrets this sacrifice

You acquire and revel in your degree in keeping malice

While I brandish my diploma in hating without a cause.

Why?

OF FAULTS, CORRECTIONS, ESCAPISMS AND CONSEQUENCES

' Hey Sammie, why were you late to church today?'
 Abegi.... what about those who didn t come at all? Are they not human beings as well?'
  This kind of discourse has become very common place among a lot of people, so much so that it has become very acceptable and even fashionable as the latest means of watering down the import of their wrongdoings, by comparing it to the next worse possible level. At such times, the interrogator who is mostly also guilty of such at one point or the other in the rememberable past, become tongue-tied and the issue is mostly laughed over or the topic substituted almost immediately. The only exception to this postulation will be if the interrogator is someone of higher authority, and even that is subject to some degree of probability.

  The truth of the matter remains that, for every inaction or action, there is a ready and waiting consequence. That one is as true and sure as the midday sun. The Scripture and Mother Nature are sisters on this one- it is the way the cosmos has been fashioned. The timing and placing of the consequence is immaterial.
  Now, correction has basic components which include content, which is the real substance of the wrongdoing, what makes it wrong and why it is wrong, giving practical reasons. Another component of correction is the sternness of it. A correction qualifies as an effective one if it carries enough deterrent in it. this can come in form of harsh words, punishment, declarations, insults whether veiled or open.  Most times, the correction intended for the defaulter is stripped of content and bite, by this method of negative comparison which in turn gives leverage to that next worse level.

  Man is bad by default. That is why no effort ought to be spared in the bid to make a good person out of someone, and mindsets such as this are usually bad for business. With this kind of approach, corrections become ineffective and devoid of steam, the defaulter tends to carry on unabashed and unquestioned, because there is usually a next worse level of offence to compare the present to, absolve oneself, and keep sliding down the steep incline to doom. Needless to say, the grave consequences waiting somewhere down the line blooms and blossoms enough to adequately reward and repay.

   A lot of good will be achieved if we do away with this escapist theory of receiving corrections. It is bad enough that the offence was committed, it will only be wise to take every form of correction in your stride and learn from it.

 
 

Valentine: Vibes from a Vanishing World

So its approaching February 14. There is love in the air. the radio, television, the internet and mass media are all awash with adverts and promos and the slogan is always 'in the spirit of the Valentine season'. Opportunistic ladies put on their best garb of behaviour, ostensibly to hook a partner down to 'be their Val'. Guys with the same labelling perfect their baits  and charm and wit for a nice good hunting and happy landing. The period is usually an interesting piece of entertainment, there being no end to the drama that is wont to unfold.

   I do not want to believe that the lion share of the enlightened population have not cared to inquire after the origin of this commemoration. One can easily understand with those who are only content with general proclamation of February 14 as Valentine's day as the only cue they need to indulge. Afterall, the information on almost anything one needs is there for the asking- at the touch of a button.

   In the Nigerian parlance, I  will not be wrong to say that the population is equally skewed between Christians and Muslims, which are the principal religions that make up our demography. but the hue and hype of the Valentine produces mostly Christian vibes... at least to the best of my knowledge.

  In all the accounts that chronicle the origin of Valentine's day, there has been one constant feature: sexual deviance and debauchery, or at best inordinate sexual relations outside of marriage, which is the Biblically prescribed visa into the foray of sexual adventure. While it is still debatable the veracity and truth of any of these accounts, that is a lesser evil compared to the glaring fact that a commemoration stuffed to the throat with such maverick show

A CASE FOR VIRGINITY

                                                                

Nature has a subliminal way of communicating to man its point of view regarding anything, particularly when its course has been altered, tampered with or even out rightly violated. It has its own fight-back mechanism, its exclusive alarm system that does not fail in communicating effectively how it feels. Conversely, when its argument is accepted wholeheartedly, there is a kind of peace, balance and cohesion that cannot be rivalled by any other solution other than going back to the drawing board, Nature’s drawing board.

  It is true that the concept of virginity today is one that is deemed overrated, trodden down and somewhat regarded as a Stone-Age phenomenon. At best, the exclamation one would get on hearing the status of the other would be a wow, and very few wows are that of admiration and respect, as opposed to the gamut of wows that are borne out of the feeling that the virgin is outlandish and not in tune with the trends and times. Some people actually go ahead to postulate obnoxious and spurious medical theories of health repercussions that would arise when a man or woman attains a certain age without doing the do. To crown the moral rot, most people run to town with these hypotheses, and actually act on the aegis of its fear, without a certain proof of its tenability.

  It is also as real as the midday sun, that virginity is a virtue which terms of reference has been unfairly restricted to the female folk. The woman is expected to be chaste and pure while waiting for Mr Right, while it is deemed societally okay for the man to go on a sexual philandering, exploring and conquering, for as long as he desires. While the society has handed the world wholesale to the man, it does not in any way negate the fact that what is good for the goose is good for the gander. Again, because of the perversion and the level of moral depravity that is the order of the day, even the concept of virginity has become departmentalized and technicalized. There are the primary, secondary and tertiary virgins, their definitions and terms of classifications as sparse as the Sahara.

  The definition of the term virgin is as simple as it gets-anything that begins to demand copious and repeated explanation to drive home a single point is a shady one, as i recently learned. For avoidance of ambiguity, a virgin is one who has not had sexual experience of any kind, requested or accidental. Experience here precludes everything that is not the fusion of the male and female reproductive organs-books, movies, fantasies, chancing on other people in the act, and everything else  in that bracket. As it would seem, the ones which fall in the accidental column would be the ones which the sin-charged atmosphere currently holding sway has forced on us, but the truth remains that an image, and opinion has been engraved on the mind of the receiver, which are most times unwholesome, and would take enormous mental and spiritual effort to erase.

  The consummation and height of the sexual experience would be the actual union of both coital equipment, and like the opening statement, nature has made it so that both sexes ought to stay innocent of conjugal experience until the marriage act is consummated. And like the stars, the advantages and blessings are legion. Even what is termed a disadvantage is often seen as such through defiled spectacles, and cannot possibly count where nature has already put a stamp of approval. If the man and his wife married as virgins, the issue of cheating and inordinate bedroom demands and desires are practically non-existent. Very few people know that since sex brought about human life, any slip in anything concerning it will automatically spell wrong for both the person and the larger society. The issue of low libido and lack of sexual prowess cannot arise, since there has been no prior experience to compare it with. The bond between the couple is second to none. There can be no boredom whatsoever. The procreation of God-fearing, sane and high-flying children is sure-banker. And i dare say, the route to heaven is straighter and easier.

It is because virginity has become utopic that the world spiritual and marital has been turned to an amphitheatre of drama, rot and riot. And Nature keeps watching, chin in hand, waiting for those who can retrace their steps and come crawling back to her.

Ogbonna Nnaemeka Henry.

GIVE ME

                                        

With matter-of-fact arms spread

Giving you a piece of my mind

Not caring how you feel, i tell you

To give me exactly what i want

How you do it or when

Is entirely yours to think or act, or do

For done my part i did

Even my wife

Hasnt got half the attention

Unction and diction

You get

And yet

with that gaping mouth

You keep both ends of your swallow open

No pity, no feeling, no milk, as they say.........

You better give me that roar of a start

No coughs or splutters

No stammers or excuses

When i insert that key in the hole.

When i engage you to work

You had better give me a noiseless nod

Never you give me that nosy nuke

That makes shifting you

A perpetual morning-mare.

Even when you decide to move

Better agree with your members

Be in harmony with your components

And give me that smooth sail

That once endeared me to you.

The determinant of our living in peace or war

Will be when i need gas to overtake

Deny me that and see my other side

And if you like

In fact its your take

Whether to sip, gulp, drink or guzzle

The precious hydrocarbon

Because all i know

Is that you must take me everywhere today

And back

Its also your take

To take me higher or lower

With the way you will behave today

When that cocktail is over

And i want to order you

Before them dignitaries.

Your choice, your choose, your life

Its your call

Try me today

And see the stuff i am made of.

Ogbonna Nnaemeka Henry.

Re: Increase in Cases of Rape and Sexual Assault on Female University Student in Nigeria by Members of the Academic Staff.


Sunday, 13 September 2015 - The Nigerian Feminist Forum (NFF) is dismayed and alarmed by what appears to be an overwhelming rise in reported cases of sexual assault and rape of female university students by male members of the academic staff and students across university campuses in Nigeria and calls for attention to the need to take action to stem this trend urgently.


In the past few months, there have been several notable reports of incidents of rape of and sexual violence on female students by members of the academic staff in several universities. For instance in the last week of August 2015, Professor Cyril Ndifon, Dean of the Faculty of Law University of Calabar is alleged to have sexually assaulted a 20 year old, 400 level law student from the same university. On or about July 23 2015 Dr. Akin Baruwa, a lecturer with the University of Lagos, allegedly raped an 18 year old female admission seeker.


It is pertinent to state here that the vast majority of cases of sexual violence against female university students in Nigeria go unreported for various reasons associated with victim shaming, stigma, character assassination, public backlash and limited access to justice for victims. In many cases, female students who have reported such cases have been subsequently targeted for reprisal attacks by thugs, cultists or university teachers.


The mass abuse of female university students in Nigeria is fueled by the lack of a consistent and clear policy by university governing bodies and school authorities concerning sexual harassment, sexual assault and rape of female students.  Student handbooks and codes of conduct for staff and students are generally ‘silent’ on this and do not adequately address issues of violence against women.  Sexual assaults are hardly mentioned during orientation for first year students neither are there any dedicated channels of redress or support for students who experience this form of violence whilst on campus.


It is not enough for university authorities to continue to disassociate themselves, single out, disown or suspend individual perpetuators of such grievous crime of gender based violence and abuse of public office and trust without providing any sort of support and care for the victims and their families.


Rape is a crime under the criminal and penal code in Nigeria. Sexual harassment, sexual assault and rape is a clear violation of Article 3 (4) of the protocol to the African Charter on Human and Peoples rights on the Rights of Women in Africa (2003), Article 2 (d) of The Convention on Elimination of all forms of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW) 1979 andSection 24 of the Violence Against Person Prohibition (VAPP) Act 2014. Sexual abuse of female students directly impedes on the progresses made in advancing  Girl-Child education, in fulfillment of the MDGs and newly adopted SDGs, as well at the objectives sited on the AU Agenda 2063regarding Girl-child education.


The Nigerian Feminist Forum hereby calls on the Academic Staff Union of Universities (ASUU) to;

(a)  Adopt and enforce a comprehensive sexual harassment policy for its members;

(b) Penalize by delisting any of its members convicted of an act of sexual offense;

(c)  Sensitize its members on the debilitating effect of sexual harassment of female students.



The governing bodies of tertiary schools should immediately;

(a)  Adopt policies and measures to address the issue of sexual violation of female university students by fellow students and members of staff;

(b) Operationalize a comprehensive policy on eradicating sexual harassment on campus;

(c)  Put in place a victim’s response mechanism for reporting, investigating and prosecution of perpetuators of sexual violence against female students;

(d) Conduct a mass sensitization on sexual violence across all campuses in Nigeria.



Members of the CSOs and Media continue to;



(a)  Support victims to report cases of sexual harassment and abuse;

(b) Ensure the full prosecution of perpetuators of sexual crimes against women;

(c)  Ensure that the ongoing cases of 2 university lectures before the law courts are not swept under the carpet;

(d) Victims of sexual abuse are given the right support and care and;

(e)  Issues of sexual abuse are kept in the front burner of national news.


The NFF is ready to offer its support and expertise to the ASUU, body of Vice-Chancellors, the National Universities Commission (NUC) ministries of education and other policy makers at federal and state levels as well as the police and law enforcement agencies, in developing appropriate skills, standards, protocols and processes to urgently respond to this growing epidemic of sexual violence in educational institutions.

THE CALL

                                                                   

It was a long, tiring day at our offshore flow station a thousand kilometres from the nearest mud house deep in the Nembe high sea.

Tonye, my subordinate, had made the day hell for me. It looked like he had chosen that day to flout all my directives. When I had returned from the break from which he had relieved me, he had made it look like we hadn’t worked the entire day. I looked good enough to weep.

  He had distorted my drawings, wrongly fixed the well heads, forgotten to insert the pigging which was meant to monitor the degradation of the pipe, and to kill it all- done one of the shoddiest welding operations I have ever seen. Not even with the Ndike indolents who were so intent on pocketing the juicy fortnightly allowances that they had insisted they knew how to weld, but had performed abysmally on first sight.

 

   The anger and frustration of having to redo all that had welled up in me as I arrived the spot. What it meant was that I wasn’t seeing Nana anymore this weekend…with all we had planned out. The correction would take at least a day and half’s painstaking and careful work. The Shell clients we worked for and their eye for detail!

  I looked at him. I couldn’t yell at him; he was at least three years my senior, both age-wise and in the profession. I couldn’t report him; he was a guy I liked; just liked for likeness sake. I could not risk my man being queried or on the tenterhooks of losing his job. A job whose take-home pay could not even take one home successfully; it ended back in the pockets of creditors; leaving one high and dry before one knew it. For all it was worth, I couldn’t even point out what he did they way it actually was; I ended up garnishing it and giving him the softest landing ever. After all, we would do the damage control together.

   Six hours later, I found out it wasn’t as bad as it had struck me initially, and we had gotten to the level where there seemed to be potentials of being with my darling Nana this weekend. The things we would do together! I was also thankful I hadn’t vented my spleen on Tonye the way it was instinctive on me to.

  I was driving home, gaily and full of expectation, when, close to the Benson-Adah junction my Samsung Galaxy rang shrilly.  It was a number that wasn’t save on my phone. ‘Hello?’

With what I heard at the other end of the line, I knew this was no drive-and-talk conversation.

I parked.

It was a gruff, drug-soaked voice. The ones you hear in movies where a comedian is trying to imitate a motor-park thug.

‘Is this Mr Johnny?’ the voice asked heavily, as if he had just had his fix of cheap snuff.

‘Yes, who is this please?’

‘Don’t worry about who I am for now. What you should worry yourself about should be where you will be after tonight. I was sent to assassinate you. As a matter of fact, I have your picture right here in my palms. Are you not the pucker-faced oil boy who lives on 17, Coker Street, has a growing potbelly and drives a 2005 Corolla?’

My blood ran cold. My right hand on the steering wheel turned clammy with emergency sweat.

‘Please sir, I cannot die now. Who sent you? What can I do to buy my life back? Please sir, I will do anything’, the words tumbled out of my mouth like the nozzle of a pistol was before me. I had begun to shiver.

‘You will do anything?’

 ‘Yes sir. Just name it, I will do it. I cannot die now sir. Please sir.’

‘Okay. What will happen is this: there are five of us in the team. You will need to buy the boys over. We need five wraps of cocaine.’

‘But sir, I do not know what cocaine is, neither do I know who sells it or where it is sold. Can I give you something else instead, or can I convert it to money or something?’

There was a long pause. What I heard next, made my blood boil.

‘Okay, lucky punk. Send us 1500 NGN recharge cards. Make it quick.’

Two days later, we were still on it. He was the one doing the calling now.

I put the phone on speaker, and the seven of my friends were listening in, in our large company lobby.

‘Sir, sorry o, I couldn’t find the NGN 400 recharge voucher you requested. Where I live the only woman who sells has only NGN 200 worth of airtime. Will that do?’

‘This guyman, you dey use me play abi? Oya send am.’

I ended up transferring NGN50 worth of airtime to him through MTN Share and Sell.